There are two main reasons we do not see a lot of movies, and they tend to be overlapping reasons. One reason is that even in retirement I do not like to waste time on the types of movies I do not enjoy, and there are lots of types in that category: movies primarily about special effects lacking any serious plot (including most poor excuses for science fiction movies); middle school humor (which is the vast majority of comedies nowadays); movies pre-occupied with killing, either fear of being killed (horror), killing other people (war movies) or struggling mightily to prevent killings (thrillers).

The second reason is that I am too cheap to actually pay money for a movie when we can go Tuesdays to selected theaters for free using our rewards card for our cable-internet-phone service. However, the three local theaters which accept our rewards card (which I believe are owned by our cable company) generally only show “popular” movies guaranteed to bring in lots of viewers. Let me give you a listing of the movies currently showing at one of those theaters:

• Bad Teacher
• Cars 2 (at 2 theaters, one in 3-D)
• Green Lantern 3D
• Horrible Bosses
• Larry Crowne
• Monte Carlo
• Mr. Popper’s Penguins
• Super 8
• Transformers (at 3 theaters!)
• Zookeeper

In the past month we have seen Super 8 (which, while a thriller, was actually enjoyable and with an ending I liked); Green Lantern (not a very successful movie because the producers ignored the title and instead concentrated on the wimpiest Hal Jordan imaginable); and Larry Crowne (enjoyable, although the writers did not realize they were writing about how one college class changed 2 lives, rather believing they were writing a love story).

The only other movie listed above that I might consider seeing is Horrible Bosses, having had a few of them myself (recently enough for them to still stick in my memory). But there are several other acclaimed movies currently out which are nowhere near any of my three neighborhood theaters, such as Beginners, Midnight in Paris and The Tree of Life. All of them are playing at that same chain 50 miles away from here. Who wants to drive that far when I could spend all that travel time reading instead? And why are all 3 theaters near me missing three of the most acclaimed current movies, instead showing 3 different versions of the insipid Transformers? Do they believe that all people in this area are dimwits without a single ounce of culture?

Of course, all this changes in another week when Harry Potter comes out!